Escaping the Cycle of Suck

Aug 23, 2018 | Memoir, Mental Models, Reflection Questions

Last night I bumped into a friend I hadn’t seen for 5 years. It was really exciting as we picked up conversation right where we left off, talking about art, design, creativity, entrepreneurship… all the juicy stuff that gets my heart racing.

I messaged him on FB today to discuss meeting up. Just for kicks I scrolled through our message history on FB. It was fun taking a trip back in time observing my younger self. My last message to him 5 years ago had a very exciting ring to it “Man after a few months of employment I decided that I’m gonna go freelance and be my own man!!”

Oh Jesus.

Between June 2013 and November 2017 I was self employed. It was my wasteland of hopelessness and crushed dreams punctuated by occasional flashes of creative joy and expression.

I won’t go into why that was the case, except to say that that’s what it was.

I’ve had 9 months to look back and reflect. To get over the bitterness. To breath in an out. To accept what happened and why it happened and in that reflection I’ve discovered a pattern. It’s a pattern that maps all of my significant failures and breakthroughs in my life and I’m really excited to share it with you.

The pattern starts with the cycle of suck. This is where no matter how hard you try, you just can’t create the outcome you’re after. You get the mentors, you read the books, you do the work, but FFS nothing’s changing.

This is followed by the plateau of letting go. You’ve tried so hard and nothing changed, so fuck it. Not trying anymore, just surrender. Pissed off at the game it feels like a huge relief to walk away from the field that kicked your ass.

Then there’s the sudden permanent life altering breakthrough and life is never the same again. Everything you wanted in the cycle of suck is now yours – or is on its way to you. You can feel it and it feels goood.

Does this sound like what you’ve experienced before?

Chances are you’re in one of these stages right now.

Reflection point:

1) Where in your life are you in the cycle of suck at the moment?

Pat yourself on the back. It’s ok, it really is, we’ve all got to start somewhere. Think about ‘not trying’ for a while. You’ve tried following the rules and it hasn’t worked out. Consider releasing your foot off the pedal for a while and giving yourself a break.

2) Where in your life are you in the plateau of letting go?

Enjoy it. Breath in, breath out. Take time to restore yourself. Do the things that make you feel awesome. Explore your curiosity. Try new things. Look after yourself. Love life.

3) Where in your life are you in an upward trajectory?

Go you, you rockstar! To maintain this level of awesomeness in this area of life keep good habits. Habits that perpetuate this goodness you’re experiencing. Be vigilant in maintaining these habits and winning will be locked into your DNA forever.
You got this.

To your success.

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